Green Wing

Worried about her age Joanna is also concerned about the dreariness of her relationship with Statham, who in turn tries to spice up their relationship through spontaneity (with the help of playing his recorder to get himself sexually aroused). However he soon becomes concerned that I.T. wiz and women-pleaser Lyndon Jones is trying to steal Joanna away from him. Meanwhile Mac discovers that despite protesting she never wanted children, his ex-girlfriend Holly is expecting with her new partner. A delighted Guy soon uses this as ammunition in his game of one-upmanship with Mac, but ends up being traumatized himself when memories of his boarding school days come back to haunt him. And Caroline juggles her nicotine urges with searching for a new roommate, but is less than thrilled with the candidate being Angela.

Joanna is turning 42, but her day brightens up when she mistakenly thinks she has received a locket as a birthday gift from Lyndon, when it is in fact from the ever doting Dr. Alan Statham (filled with his own "love juice"). Meanwhile Guy is compiling a fanciability league table of all the female staff, the results of which don't go over too well with Dr. Caroline Todd who retaliates with her own ungenerous male staff summary (but Guy is still happy to be the aggregate total winner). Elsewhere Boyce and Martin use the CT scanner to weed out the money prizes in packets of crisps, the former of whom also spends as much time as he can taunting Dr. Statham about his gay tendencies. And Caroline tries to adapt to living with Angela's active sex life and harp playing.

Hormones are abound in the hospital with Mac the centre of both Caroline and Sue's affections, Boyce and Kim having fun together and Karen writing a love poem about Martin who in turn is desperate to impress Caroline. And of course there is Joanna (sporting a new bleached hairdo) who is still after Lyndon much to Statham's annoyance, and so after listening to Boyce's advice on women, decides to act mysterious by playing 'kidnapper' and having his way with Joanna in the woods. Meanwhile Caroline and Angela decide to throw a party and the hospital staff are invited – including an apprehensive Martin who can't decide on what to wear. After turning down Sue's selection of clothes from the ‘dead people box', the Staff Liaison Officer takes him shopping for the perfect outfit with interesting results.

Statham still isn't completely over Joanna and spends all his day trying to win her back by pretending to hang himself, singing ‘All By Myself' to her via a megaphone and by challenging Lyndon to a tug-of-war in the cafeteria for the hand of Joanna. However when he meets the hospital's chaplain Cordelia he soon finds another object for his affection. Meanwhile Caroline is feeling broody but is having conflicting thoughts about who should be the prospective daddy. Still infatuated with Mac, she also finds herself drawn to Guy and his ‘layers' - most of which he invents in order to manipulate her into a date out in the countryside. Martin gets his exam results (which are held hostage by Sue for most of the day) but discovers he has failed yet again – however not until Guy evilly convinces him he has passed. And a cardboard cut-out of Jesus keeps popping up around the hospital.

The hospital is hosting a charity Grand Slave Auction with Statham, Caroline, Guy and Lyndon all up for bid and while there is high competition for some, others aren't so lucky. Meanwhile Caroline falls on Sue's bad (and murderous) side when she admits to having feelings for Mac, but Mac surprises them all by revealing his new girlfriend Lady Emily and by the announcement that he his leaving the hospital after being offered a consultancy position in Sheffield. Martin decides that the way to win Caroline's heart is by being a bastard, Joanna finally finds out where she stands with Lyndon and Harriet is called into the school to talk about her troublesome son.

It's Mac's last day and Sue and Caroline are struggling to cope with the thought of losing him. While Sue offers to kill in order to keep Mac in the hospital, Caroline spends most of the day trying to find fault with Sheffield in order to deter him from leaving. Meanwhile Martin finds himself in a tricky situation when he reads a personal letter of Guy's and discovers that not only is Guy adopted, but that his real mother was called Joanna Peerson – the surname of whom also happened to be the maiden name of Joanna Clore. Unaware that his mother and work colleague are one of the same, Guy has no qualms in taking up one of Mac's bets to prove his prowess with the ladies by bedding an older woman of Mac's choice – Joanna. When Martin later discovers his half-brother's intentions he rushes over to stop it – which ends in a botox stabbing, staff on the run from the police in an ambulance and a major cliff-hanger – literally.